At least twice a week on my way to work, I pass a man on the street who is wearing Guerlain Mitsouko. This guy is Asian, young, dressed in “Seattle style” (baggy jeans and a sensible coat and backpack). I want to say “hi” and let him know I like Mitsouko too, but since it’s always 5:30 a.m. when I smell him, I keep quiet. (It would be weird to strike up a conversation about perfume on a dark street with a stranger — at the crack of dawn, especially with the implication: ‘you smell good’ hanging in the air.)
Since I’ve been writing for Now Smell This, LOTS of men have written me wondering why I’m “prejudiced” against men wearing women’s perfumes. I was surprised at this “interpretation” of my articles. Do I sometimes imply men’s colognes are for men and women’s perfumes are for women?
Men who wear “feminine” scents come in many ‘types.’ There’s the natural, confident man who wears what he likes, be it Drakkar Noir or Yves Saint Laurent Paris. Then there’s the exhibitionist/militant who drenches himself in, say, Fracas — and if you don’t ask about his scent, he’ll start flailing his arms and rearranging his scarf (better to disperse the heavy aroma in your direction) and if that fails to elicit a comment, he offers: “Do you like my perfume? It’s Fracas by Robert Piguet…it’s for WOMEN but I love it so….” (Yes, the dialogue is stilted, but often, so is he.) Some men have told me they wear women’s perfumes “at home”…afraid people will get the ‘wrong impression’ if they wear rose-y, tuberose-y scents in public. Then, there are men who do wear women’s perfumes in public, but in miniscule quantity (“a drop only for me to smell”). There’s nothing wrong with any of these “types” and I’ve fallen into all categories except No. 2. (well…perhaps even category No. 2 in my salad days).
One misconception about men who wear women’s perfumes: they’re gay. I’ve known many straight men who wear women’s perfumes. My roommate in college, a tennis jock who chased every skirt in the dorm, wore Calvin Klein Obsession for women. I remember reading Ilie Năstase wore Fracas proudly (something about those tennis men). A construction foreman my father knew wore all the perfumes in his wife’s formidable Avon collection (she bought them for the bottles, not the scents). One gay man I know says he doesn’t wear women’s perfumes because he does not want to “feed stereotypes” about gay men “wanting to be women”! So you see, this is a complex subject, ripe for contention and woe.
I do wear “feminine” perfumes that suit my tastes (no soliflores of the soft/sweet, “angelic” type, no tween-y fruity-florals, or tuberose-rich perfumes, thank you); in fact, with a few of my choices, I think I go to the head of the class…the class of men who wear feminine fragrances with their heads held high.
The first women’s perfume I wore was my mother’s Chanel No. 5; it was kept in a wicker basket in the bathroom, surrounded by Kleenex, Q-tips and cotton balls. I was a child and I thought it smelled good (my parents, as ever, let me do as I pleased and said not a word about Chanel No. 5 being “for girls”). After reading The Secret of Chanel No. 5, I got a quarter ounce of Chanel No. 5 parfum; it’s delightful…and strong. I’ll probably follow Marilyn Monroe’s lead and wear it in the privacy of my bed after a warm shower. Chanel No. 5 has always smelled clean to me and “clean” is for everybody.
I once, not too long ago, thought Chanel Bois des Iles was a scent that should only be worn by women. Not anymore. It’s a warm, sunny fragrance that allows me to wear a Chanel No. 5-type perfume “in public.” Cuir de Russie? My love of that perfume brings me to: Molinard Habanita. Thanks to the onslaught of unisex/niche fragrances over the last decade, Cuir de Russie and Habanita no longer smell “womanly” in the least, though they’re still classified as feminine perfumes by the companies who make them. Men are no longer fearful of rose, orange blossom, iris, even jasmine, in fragrances, and the powder and leather in these scents makes me feel pampered and a bit louche at the same time.
I’ve been wearing Robert Piguet Bandit longer than any other feminine fragrance; its mix of notes produces an aroma that reminds me of cigarette ash and narcissus blossoms — an acquired taste perhaps, but Bandit is an original; I’ve never mistaken it for another fragrance.
On a trip south of the border during college, I encountered a bottle of Ivoire de Balmain; back when I bought it, Ivoire de Balmain came in a much nicer bottle than it does today and it didn’t smell as “pure” (and “thin”) as it does now. If I rough it up (layer it) with some musky, cumin-y, or leather perfume, it still works for me. Balmain also makes the great Jolie Madame; there’s nothing feminine about its vibrant green-violet-leather aroma. (Men: if asked what you’re wearing, and you’re too embarrassed to say Jolie Madame, you can always respond ‘Bel Monsieur.’)
I wear several of Guerlain’s (they of the treacly romance-novel storylines/PR) “feminine” fragrances: Jicky (which debuted as a fragrance for all and that’s suitable for a man in each of its formulations — Eau de Toilette, Eau de Parfum, Parfum); Shalimar Eau de Parfum (no ball gown and tuxedoed companion necessary for its enjoyment); and Mitsouko (nix the rice face powder and kimono…if you wish).
Serge Lutens fragrances have always come with “permission” for both men and women to wear them, but a few of the perfumes in the line attract women more than men; enter: Rahat Loukoum. With its Bosphorus barbershop-cum-candy store aromas, who says a man can’t wear it? Men love the scents of talc and desserts so why can’t we smell delectable ourselves? Another pow(d)er-house feminine scent I wear — in minimal dosage — is Lorenzo Villoresi Alamut — despised by many, but appreciated by the perfume cognoscenti (with desensitized gag reflexes).
I recently discovered the pleasures of Jean Patou 1000 Eau de Toilette and Joy Parfum. 1000’s scent reminds me of fresh bread and osmanthus 'jam' (a neat combo) and I wear it and Joy (which many compare to Chanel No. 5 in its “feminine factor”) outside the bedroom. The first day I wore Joy, I was walking at the arboretum; the wind off the lake was strong and frigid, but two things warmed me up: the scent of Joy’s hothouse flowers and the sight of a Fox terrier mix running off leash. That little dog, scampering along the rocky shore, happy, vivacious, in his prime, seemed to challenge the choppy waves of the lake to come ashore and catch him. He ran up to every dog and person in his path, delighting in the moment. Watching him frolic, I decided only one word fit his mood: JOY, and then I realized I was wearing a fragrance made to embody that mood. A serendipitous encounter between a dog and a perfume produced a moment of happiness in me.
I may never know how the “Mitsouko Man” I often see and smell came to love that fragrance, but I can ask you, men and women, to answer a few questions. Men: what women’s perfumes do you (dare to) wear, where do you wear them? What comments, if any, do you receive? Women: do any of your male friends and family wear women’s perfumes? Do you give them a hard time if they do?
Note: top left image of Georgia O’Keeffe (a person who would no doubt wear whatever fragrance she wanted, where and when she wanted to wear it) and top right image of a camellia (yes, there are many scented varieties) via Wikimedia Commons.
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My fiance’ wears Bandit. I sprayed it on him myself one night so I could see how it smelled on him and loved it as did he. I’m quite pleased when I’d find him smelling of Bandit without having to spray him with it myself.
I feel like where fragrance is concerned is such a personal preference in what you choose to wear that I don’t really believe in defining them by gender. I wear a lot of colognes that are genderless. Likewise, I have a few male friends who love Amaouge Epic Woman and would readily wear it.
I bought my first bottle of Bandit a few months ago. All I get is smoke and it’s a little sour/bitter. More like marijuana smoke than cigarettes. Its growing on me…but it this how it’s supposed to smell or do you think I may have gotten a bad bottle?
My bottle of Bandit smells like cigarette ashes, mint and a vague notion of leather.
I get the mint note from Cabochard also.
Your bottle is probably good, Bandit is a ‘difficult’ perfume. YMMV
I’ll admit the tester I initially received of Bandit smelled different. The FB I have smells predominately like leather though.
I have the same exact question about my bottle of Bandit. I had built it up in my mind to be the most shocking perfume of all time and then when my bottle arrived I was a little disappointed. It’s nice but it reminds me of Azuree or Safari. There all good but I had such high expectations for Bandit. I have often wondered if I have the real thing.
I actually feel the same about my bottle of Habanita. So many rav reviews and then all I can smell is baby powder with a bit of cigar.
Garamascara: baby powder and cigar is a great combo!
Isn’t that an old cartoon character (and in Roger Rabbit). . .Baby Herman? The baby with the potty mouth and the cigar? I guess you found his fragrance!
Habanita was a disppointment of powder for me, too.
klytaemnestra: As I read some perfume commenters here and there it seems Epic Woman is more popular with men than Epic Man!
I wear Perles de Lalique, Bandit, and Vol de Nuit, although the latter not very often, certainly not often enough.
None of those smell particularly feminine to me, and I don’t know how anyone would classify Jicky as feminine.
If a fragrance is unusual and doesn’t lean towards being very loud or ‘pretty’, I’m all about experimenting with it.
Oh and the David Yurman fragrance too. I can’t stand the first 30-60 minutes, but afterwards it settles down very nicely on me and I’ve gotten compliments on it.
relleric: yep…tons of men wear Jicky…but Guerlain always advertises it for women.
Shalimar
Ubar
Hypnotic Poison
Poison
Carnal Flower
Guet-Apens
Samsara
Too many to list. I wear what I like everywhere and in copious amounts. ;0
People who have gotten to know me say that I look and act a bit intimidating @ first glance.
But really I’m just a big ole teddy bear.
I have never received any negative comments from strangers about my scents. Compliments and sometimes an odd stare, but never anything negative. YMMV
Bear, I have a 17 year old young man (son) that loves to wear Shalimar, Dzing, and sometimes N0. 5., he is a football player and lifts some very heavy weights, yall smell great!
Wonderful to see the younger people wearing anything they please!
And when I was 17, I wore Canoe which started out as marketed to women and then did a gender switch, was marketed to men.
Thanks for making me remember!
It is my dream to find a man who wears Shalimar….
Here I am, darlin’!! 😉
I’m hoping your mystery Mitsouko wearer will read this and de-lurk. Wouldn’t it be cool if he was a fellow blog reader/poster?
Can’t comment on women’s fragrances worn by men, though I did recently purchase Normandie for my father because he collects Normandie ship memorabilia. He loves it and wears it!
Karin: I love the scent of Normandie too…and it would be great if the Mitsouko Man read NST and recognized himself.
I love Joy and have a 1/4 oz of the parfum that I wear regularly. Likewise with No. 5. Great perfume is great perfume!
Benj: I got a vintage JOY parfum yesterday and 19 hours later I still smell it on my skin…vibrant even in old age. HA!
None of the men I know wear “women’s” perfume… oh heck, hardly any of them wear perfume at all. But I find it very intriguing when men can pull off powdery fragrances. When I pass by some strangers who do, I’m tempted to take a good whiff from them…
Hessed: I really like woody-powdery scents too…a powdery sandalwood fragrance can’t be beat.
The most feminine fragrance I ever purchased was Serge Lutens A La Nuit, and while I loved the smell of pure Jasmine, I had a hard time wearing it anywhere. All I could picture in my head was “this smells like grandma…”
I’m really not into overly masculine OR overly feminine scents. I love the mixture of feminine and masculine smells, like a masculine wood mixed with a sweet vanilla or floral note. I also like smells that defy categorization (CdG Leaves Calamus, or CBIHP Russian Caravan Tea). I also love Creed Virgin Island Water (Coconut+Lime+White Flowers? So good.)
Most of the scents I buy these days aren’t really labeled for him or for her, so I guess I skip the dilemma. When you are selling sex appeal, I realize that it’s difficult to avoid marketing to gender norms entirely, but I wish that all scents were just unlabeled. Wear what you like!
SuperConnected: well, I hope you used A la Nuit SOMEwhere, SOMEhow…even if you didn’t wear it.
“. . .difficult to avoid gender norms entirely. . .”
I think you’re hinting at something that I am reacting to–I don’t like pigeon-holing people, including by gender or gender roles. I know, I KNOW that we all recognize and categorize, and male/female is such a basic way to do that. And yet, as much as we can accept the natural fluidity of these two “norms”–the reality that we each have elements in common with the other–the more we allow people to express themselves authentically, in perfume, career choice, whatever.
*steps off of soap box*
As a young girl I was far more likely to be caught trying on my dad’s “colognes” than mom’s “perfumes”. They just seemed to fit so well with my tomboy personality compared to her white florals. There was always Stetson on the shelf and Grey Flannel was for special occasions. (I’m from a very small town – all fragrances came from the drugstore.). I also remember dousing myself in a bottle of Old Spice my uncle had left at the house when I was seven. It wasn’t a full bottle, but whatever was left was used up in one uber-generous pouring. I got one heck of a spanking that day. As a teenager I gave him birthday and holiday gifts of Aspen, Safari, and Polo Sport and promptly used them all myself.
Today, Caron Pour un Homme, Farenheit, and Lauder for Men are my go-to masculines. Chanel Bleu will probably be the next “gift” I get for my husband. (anything for him doesn’t get counted on my perfume budget.). I sure would like to get my hands on a bottle of Safari though.
Sorry, failed to start with saying how I really dislike gender bias in fragrance and (obviously) have quite a bit of experience crossing the lines myself…
Clearly I shouldn’t have skipped coffee this morning
Lucy – if you need some Safari drop me a line anneroosie @ hotmail.com . The other year I ended up with more than I can ever wear – a curse of perfumista infatuation. I have an extra bottle…. Yours for swap or $.
I assumed she meant the men’s, since she was buying it for her dad… but I guess I shouldn’t assume such things!
Ah, good point. I don’t have a bottle of men’s Safari. 😉
If you’re not picky about vintage, you can get it on the RL website. If you are… *bay.
Lucy: glad you found someone to supply Safari! There are always bottles lurking out there somewhere.
Word. I love Old Spice on myself – it was originally marketed to women then they took out the rose and added a ship to the bottle. I don’t have any associations with Grandpa or Dear Old Dad wearing it and in my experience even people who do don’t recognize it as Old Spice on me. I don’t know if it is my body chemistry or if they just don’t expect it on a woman. I’ve been wearing Lonestar Memories recently and find it to be a kind of high powered version of Old Spice after the delicious smoky rubber part burns off. I’m dying to try it on my husband.
Hey Kevin,
Great topic. My older brother, who is a ‘manly man’ (and now 50!) has worn women’s fragrances and loved them, for the very fact that women approach him telling him how GREAT he smells! He could not care less whether fragrances are ‘intended’ for a man or a woman… if it smells good, wear it I say!!!
Sarahbeth: an excellent ploy of your brother’s. HA
This is a great topic. I don’t think that it’s so much the gender of the perfume that sometimes feels inappropriate as much as the genre. Whether you’re a man or a woman, going to the gym wearing a big rose chypre just doesn’t seem right. Or, an 18-year old girl wearing Serge Lutens’ Muscs Koublaï Khan or Al Oudh by L’Artisan Parfumeur is just weird. All this goes to the core of our ideas of what a man should smell like… and what women should smell like.
But there are scents that we just associate more with women. I’ve been to the store 3 times to buy Dyptique’s Olene and I just can’t bring myself to buy it. Its jasmine overload is so womanly… although I’m sure it would be explosive on certain men. But I’ll wear EL Private Collection Tuberose Gardenia without a moment’s hesitation.
However when asked, I tell people , “Wear what you want… forget what other people think.” Great theory… but sometimes difficult to practice.
Normand: agree 100 percent. Olene is a great scent…I take it you’ve worn a sample of it here and there? I guess you could get your fix with the soap.
There’s a soap? I didn’t see that at the store… but Holt’s seems to have only a small supply of their scents. As jasmine soliflores go, I find it more accessible than À la nuit… but… I’m not sure. I also flirted with buying À la nuit for the longest time… but never did.
As for layering, I had a sample of À la nuit and I tried to layer it with other jasmine scents like Eau Sauvage and Le 3e Homme by Caron… with no success whatsoever. Jasmine is a tough one.
Normand: just looked at the Diptyque site and don’t see an Olene soap anymore…seems there are only five soap scents these days, too bad!
Yep… thanks for checking.
I wear Chanel No.5 Eau de Toilette and Gucci by Gucci quite frequently. They have this quiet ‘elegance’ and ‘sophistication’ that I want to have though both two words are more associated with the ladies. I like how they make me feel and smell refined.
I do often cringe whenever someone asks me what I’m wearing but I have a share in compliments. There was one time when someone actually told me that the Chanel ‘seems so you,’ whether it was positive or negative, that was left unknown. Overall, I just wear what I like!
In the past, when I wanted to wear No 5 or even Coco for that matter, I used to be afraid that someone would ask and then think it was too “mature”. Most people never ask, which helped me get over it. When someone did ask what I was wearing, I’d just say “Chanel”. It seemed to cover enough bases – deflect the question enough. Most non-perfume people hear Chanel and have a whole entire set of ideas in their heads and won’t pursue it further. Now I don’t care and tell them exactly what I’m wearing and most regular people end up with a big puzzled look on their faces. Esp. on a day when I’m wearing more than one fragrance at a time. Honestly, most non-perfume people have no idea about fragrances. You could tell them anything you wanted and they’d never know it was a woman’s fragrance.
AnnS: most people just don’t care what we’re wearing…and that’s GOOD for the most part!
Agreed!
echungky: I guess it’s best not to delve TOO deeply in such comments with so many possibilities of interpretation! IF it freaks you out to say the name of the fragrance…have an arsenal of fake names to throw out for scents you wear. “Very rare stuff…you’ll never find it!”
Kevin: “It’s called ‘Mishima’!” HA! 😉
When I get an order of samples in, I am always way too excited to try them two-by-two… I must smell them all at once. Enter wonderfully indulgent boyfriend who loans me both arms for skin space.
I don’t really believe in the gendering of perfumes, and I definitely enjoy many so-called masculine frags myself (obsession for men, gucci rush for men, john varvatos artisan, etc). These are frags that my boyfriend technically owns, but that I wear too. Even though he lets me put my samples on him for me to smell, he is incredibly hesitant to actually *wear* anything that seems feminine to him… which to me, are often quite unisex fragrances: CBIHP cedarwood tea, back to black, de bach, fcuk for her, etc. It seems the fear of smelling ‘feminine’ is deeply engrained in so many men… which is a shame, because some of those smell damn good on him.
Meg: if he honestly does not know something is for men or women but gets a vibe it’s not for him, we’ll assume it’s a “taste” thing. I know women who HATE floral perfumes and men who’d rather wear lavender or even carnation! (Old Spice) than cedar.
I suggested to my business partner that he use lavender to keep the moths out of his closet. He recoiled at the notion of smelling like lavender and sneered when I told him that lavender was considered male in fragrance circles.
Kevin: great article! I think there is lots on the women’s side of the counter that many men could easily wear. Lancome Magie Noir, Clinique Aromatics Elixer or Wrappings, Lauder’s Knowing, Dior Diorella especially, Chanel No 19 edt – vetiver in all forms is good on ANYONE. And a lot of the Goutal line – Hadrien, Neroli, Chevrefeuille, Muguet, Mandragore and M Pourpre, Vanille Exquise, etc etc etc…. I think the original Opium would smell divine on a man.
My Dad used to wear the men’s Balenciaga fragrance that is no longer in production. It is just an oriental powdery glory. I loved it and used to dab it on too. My Mom, however, hated it. She said it was too feminine. But my Dad wore it anyway. So much of fragrance is just perception and personal experiences. I would love to sneak some Le Labo Rose 31 on my husband, lol. He’d probably wear it anyway if I asked him too because he loves roses.
AnnS: Never smelled Balenciaga…but did like their HoHang years and years ago.
Gosh, Ann, Rose 31 seems awfully unisex. Wasn’t there all kinds of “shocking” chatter about it even in the New York Times because it was such a big seller to men? That and Voleur de Roses don’t seem very rosy to me, in fact.
No – you are right. Rose 31 is very unisex – it was a bad example. My husband would wear Petit Cherie if I asked him to! My husband likes Rose 31 b/c it smells like roses and Mexican food, lol.
Most men I know wear fougères or colognes, they provide very little excitement in their perfume choices!
My husband used not to care about perfumes; but once he started finding sample vials in his own drawers (the way those vials take over a house is amazing!) he started to take notice and became mildly willing to play the perfume game with me.
Before I gave him anything to test, he would first ask me: this is not for women, right?
He was suspicious, but I would always say no! 😉 Now he doesn’t care anymore about the sex of a fragrance: the only way to scare him is to say: tuberose! Head-ache inducing! …and other selected keywords.
I love Cuir de Russie on him, he liked a rose-oud which I couldn’t stand and eventually forbade, but in general he is drawn to woody, incensy smells…those that are usually described as unisex..
He’s never used any of my florals, despite me thinking how good they smell on him. He is happy with my niche woods and incense. Oh, and he would be horrified to buy a bottle, go figure. He uses mines! 🙁
Zazie: AGREE WITH HIM re: tuberose! I can only truly enjoy it in fresh bouquets…or in soap.
My boyfriend was given a large tester bottle of Lacoste Touch of Pink a few years ago by his father, who had gotten it from a client of his. It had no gender labels on it at all, so he assumed it was a men’s cologne, and wore it often. I mean, with the trend for frat boys to wear pink, we didn’t think it was outside the realm of possibility, right? Frankly, I think it smells wonderful on him. Anyway, only more recently when I dragged him to the perfume counters with me did we both realize it was a “women’s” fragrance! I was afraid he was going to stop wearing it, but he just shrugged his shoulders and continues to wear it to this day. I love my man <3
Oh, good for him!
Halimeade: glad he didn’t let a “label” ruin a scent for him!
I have been interested in perfume for about 4 years now, I’m 18 so still a perfume novice and have a lot to learn about perfume. but I do have a clear sense of prejudice in the perfume world. I don’t categorise perfume into “perfume” and “aftershave”, for men and women, because it’s stereotypical and old fashioned. What’s more, aftershave is classified in perfume as concentration not gender, aftershave is the stuff you get in the pour/splash bottle, which just happens to mostly in men’s lines.
I also don’t sniff a bottle and think: ooh that’s a man’s smell, or that smells like a woman’s fragrance. I don’t believe in men’s and women’s perfumes, I just see bottles on shelves in department stores specifically “aimed” at men or women by the brands that made them. Ok maybe sometimes I do, but it’s only the deep fizzy perfumes like Davidoff’s and the Joop’s that I think are for men. And the classy, dated ones like Dior Poison and Lancome Tresor that I really think are for women, there are others aswell for both sides but I can’t think of them off the top of my head.
I think the men’s side of perfume is old fashioned, and most of the time boring, perfume houses seem scared to be daring and try something new with men’s fragrances. I am still talking department store.
Chanel told us Bleu de Chanel would be unexpected. so we thought it was going to be something outgoing, the breakthrough that would change men’s fragrances to be more than dull and safe and deep. but no, it’s boring. it’s fresh and clean and marine and smells like plain ol’ aftershave. so it is in a way “unexpected”, because it doesn’t smell “unexpected” and that’s what we were expecting. and because of men’s perfumes being so uninspired and dark and boring, I tend to venture over to the women’s counter to find more full-bodied, adventurous scents. I don’t see Chanel No5 clean at all, to me it’s actually a little bit dirty.
I wear perfumes aimed at men and women. my natural taste is sweet/gourmand, though I do like others too. my signature scent is Viktor & Rolf flowerbomb. not because it’s aimed at women or because I want to smell like a woman, or because I’m gay. but because I fell in love with it straight away when I first smelled it and thought this is amazing and I want to wear this for the rest of my life.
I also like Angel and Alien, though I think Alien smells more like a man’s fragrance. I like Miss Dior Cherie, and the Prada’s.
I like D&G the one for men, D&G light blue for men, Givenchy very irresistible for men, TM A*Men, Dior farenhiet 32, Dior homme sport, Chanel allure homme sport.
Because I’m not a true perfumista I don’t wear perfume as to what the weather’s doing outside, or to wear to sleep. Just everyday, how I feel, what I feel like wearing, and I go for perfumes with high sillage and do like the occasional compliment, I’m in my final/2nd year of college and since May last year when I first bought flowerbomb I’ve had one compliment at college from a friend, she said “ooh you smell really nice”, she’s also complimented me on a couple of other fragrances.
unfortunatley, my family are still stuck in the past and call perfumes “perfume” and “aftershave”, and expect women to wear “perfume” and men to wear “aftershave”. though my cousin Antonia told me she sometimes prefers men’s perfumes(though she did say aftershave) because women’s perfumes can too light and sweet.
you should wear whatever takes your fancy, regardless whether it’s creator wants it to be worn by a woman or a man.
Good for you – there is so much great stuff out there to try. You have lots of time to smell and develop your tastes. All us perfume people are kind of crazy anyway – regardless of whether it’s “perfume” or “aftershave” – it’s FRAGRANCE. Most of the people I know would be horrified at the amount of fragrance I have and love, regardless of whether it’s men’s or women’s.
yes, I have been given a couple of samples from someone on here, I was completely oblivious to niche before that. and your right Ann. and just reading my comment now I realise some of it wasn’t very clear about flowerbomb, I am gay but don’t wear it to smell like a woman or because it’s for women, just to clear that up :L I realised it could be read differently, I’m not very clear with my words.
Owen: whenever I hear the word “aftershave” I cringe…I could never believe men put such harsh stuff onto just-shaved faces…like pouring lemon juice on a burn! NO!
YES! my dad does that, applies perfume after having a shave. it nearly kills his skin :L
perfume can sting a bit even with moisturiser. it’s best to wait about 10mins before applying.
isn’t aftershave supposed to be a balm to soothe the skin at least? not burn the layers off.
You sound very wise, Owen, and also knowledgable about fragrance. I also think it’s funny to have to call all men’s scent either “aftershave” or “cologne.” Sometimes “perfume” doesn’t sound quite right either, but I definitely like the words “scent” or “fragrance.”
yes I know what you mean, it doesn’t seem to right to call some perfumes “perfume”. sometimes because they’re awful and not worthy of such a title, or because they smell too manly :L.
and it’s your skin chemistry that determines whether you can wear a fragrance or not. I know most are universal but some can turn more masculine or feminine on the skin than paper or someone else.
When I first started wearing fragrance, I was really insecure about “crossing the aisle” into the Women’s scents. That is until a female friend finally broke it down to me as basically, “If you like the way it makes you smell, then just wear it ’cause other people are gonna like it regardless.”
Of the perfumes marketed to women that I’ve worn, the two that I thought smelled the best on me (and, actually, garnered the most compliments from women) were JPG Classique EdT and Harajuku Lovers Music, which I bought on a whim ’cause it was half-off at Nordstroms that weekend. I tend to wear both of these to more relaxed occasions like house parties or bar-hopping nights.
My taste in Men’s fragrances at this point tends to lean more floral anyway (such as “Fleur du Male,” “Dior Homme,” Hanae Mori’s men’s EdP), so I don’t think most of my friends — who aren’t all that into fragrance to begin with — can really tell when I’m wearing a “Female” scent as opposed to a “Male.” I’m at the point now where I just put on whatever suits my mood/the occasion.
Though I do still get a little miffed when the retail clerks feel the need to remind me that, “These are the WOMEN’S fragrances, you know?” But I guess I’ll get over that in time. 🙂
BlackRaspberry: those sales clerks!
HA! Nearly every time to go to buy a fragrance, or sniff, or cop some free samples, I get an SA in the “men’s” side who feels the need to demonstrate their “openmindedness” when they learn that I’m buying/sniffing/searching for myself! Something in their tone always makes it so clear that they are trying to put me at ease rather than genuinely open to the idea that the scents are unisex! I can only imagine it must be even worse for men doing the same in the “women’s” frags!
I am a goth girl that was lucky enough to be a teenager in the 80’s and remember one special beautiful boy from the club that bathed himself in Poison. Anything he touched would reek of Poison forever after. And I loved it. I used to sniff longingly the sofa cushions and car seat where he had sat. Of course these items too would be permeated by the smell of clove cigarettes and Rave #3 hair spray. Such a sexy combination!
garamascara: Poison is a BIG perfume to pull off.
I think the only ‘male’ frags I wear are Guerlain’s Vetiver, Kenzo Air ( by the way, has anyone got a source for this now? I’m nearly out!) and Chanel Egoiste. I don’t really think of any of them as being terribly male, and there’s other Lutens, Malle and Tauer frags that I love and wear, which aren’t marketed as male, but feel maybe more more masculine than certain fem frags like Bandit, Black, or Black Cashmere. I pretty much just wear what I think smells good!
Kate: last time I looked, KenzoAir was at tons of online discounters.
I’ve been told that Mitsouko was the perfume of Chaplin and JOnasis, which, if true, would suggest that its supposed gender migrated over the years, (just like Jicky and many other Guerlains).
The truth is that very few non-perfumistas even have an idea of what smells are supposedly associated with genders in the perfume world. While they might think a really flloral (like a Lilly of the Valley soliflore) is a bit girly or something really aftershavey is masculine, or may think that any thing other than Old Spice is feminnine, most have no idea what a Fougere, Chypre, or Soliflore is.
Dilana: ignorance is BLISS…and it’s good to come across people who could care less about perfume! HA!
Lovely article, thank you! I also have to say that my father- a true perfume lover- would tiptoe in my room (when I was at home) to spray himself before his work, every time he would run out of his perfume… Even now, he asks me to try some of my fragrances, and when I told him at some point “Dad, people will think you are gay”, (with mum being present during the dialogue), he replied “So, what…” and he sprayed a considerable amount of my L’Ombre Dans Leau. I think, he belongs to the natural, confident category who wear what they like…
Lexy: OH, I love L’Ombre dans l’eau and never really think of it as feminine at all…
My father has always been the smelliest person in my life (in a good way); scores of my childhood scent memories are based off a combination of his soaps/aftershaves/deodorants/colognes layered atop one another (fun fact: Epic Man totally smells like the cloud of vapor that wafted out the bathroom after my father’s morning toiletries). He’s always been willing to wear somewhat “dandyish” traditional fragrances that would be considered feminine by modern standards, but I don’t know if he currently wears anything actually marketed to women. I gave him my sample vial of Habanita some years ago, but he never got back to me on whether he liked it.
If any of my other male acquaintances wear fragrance regularly, feminine or otherwise, they’re /extremely/ subtle about it. I think I’ll ask the group of guys I game with next Sunday and report back!
rziest: do…these days one would think themselves BOLD and MODERN by not caring about “gender” in fragrance…at least that’s what people SAY.
Though I am female and hetero, I have always leaned towards an adrogynous style of dress, preferring ease of movement and casualness to fussy and frilly styles. The fact that Bulgari Black was ‘unisex’, sold as a man’s scent and homed in a rubber wheel made me feel like I had found my perfect scent. (it was my first buy as a perfume collector).
The irony is that I still dont own any fragrances that are gendered as male. My fear is that although I might like it initially, over time the masculinity will become more apparent to my amateur nose! Ones that I have so far liked: armani attitude, Dior pour homme sport, and,
Prada infusion d’homme. I have come the closest to buying the last as I love that floral soapiness but no-one else seems to like it on me. The ‘female’ infusion d’iris is much preferred by male and female perfumistas but to me its just too weak and watery…
Any other women (or men) that prefer the d’homme version? (sorry I’v strayed off topic)
p.s my worry is more that i will have wasted money on a perfume I don’t want to wear anymore than that I will have smelled ‘masculine’.
I like Bulgari black. In fact, I have three Bulgaris, which I bought when they were originally marketed for men, including Blue and Green Tea, the latter was quickly re-categorized for woman.
Although I occasionally consider a scent too masculine (or simply too strong) for me, some of my favorites are marketed for men, including Itasca and Baudelaire. I figure that since I a woman, they will end up smelling womanly on me. (And I can definately imagine Mitsouko smells smokey and masculine when cutting through the Seatle dampness).
Also I recently went to purchase a FDM and couldn’t resist Geranium Pour Monsieur. Somehow smelling spearmint gum and then a little sharp feels nice and fresh, if not exactly girly.
Great, great article, Kevin, thank you.
When I was sampling the Bulgaris I left the Bulgari Black sample in the bathroom because it didn’t suit me. I just placed it next to DH’s after shave and said nothing. After about 2 weeks, low and behold he liked it on himself! He likes to wear my Prada Intense now too. You have no idea how much he’s “grown” as a person because of this. He was resolute about 1) not wearing his wife’s perfume and 2) not changing his Drakkar Noir for all the tea in China! 😉
When I was born, I didn’t have a choice: I was born straight. I’m the pinkest, glitteriest, girly girl but I prefer male scents like: L’Eau de Kenzo, Bulgari Aqua, Chrome and DSquared Ocean Wet Wood to the women’s versions of the first and last.
My dad was a European gent who loved fragrances. He was thrilled to wear what I brought home for him: Voile D’Ete, Heritage, and Vol de Nuit. He liked spicy (obviously) while I preferred the Chanel No. 19 he once gifted me with. A man could so easily wear that come to think of it!
Kevin: You’re right. This is a huge topic. Calvin Klein said it best with CKBe. Just be!
Celestia: indeed!
So many scents just plain Smell Good, and should be worn by whoever wants to wear them! I love a number of “manly” scents, (lavender, snadalwood, and especially citrus-y colognes during the hot summer months and see no reason why men should be restricted to those few poor offerings on the male side of the perfume counter!
Kevin, great piece (as usual)! It had me giggling at the ‘Seattle Chill’ and the thought of chatting up a stranger here – at 5:30 am! – about his scent.
I’m such a believer in ‘If you like how it smells, wear it!” and I fought creating a section for men in the shop for months. I finally caved, and the relief on the male faces is palpable when they see the sign: Scents for the Gents. One of these days I should throw Amaranthine or Jasmin Full into the mix for entertainment purposes 😉
F.D.: Thanks…and you should mix things up on those counters! Easy to do the way bottles rarely say “for women” etc. these days, especially niche scents.
(Mitsouko “pour homme”! Exciting.)
It’s wonderful to read of so many people who are enjoying the so-called opposite side of the fragrance aisle. I admit, I love smelling florals on men, and I say, wear whatever you want!
I find that I myself am not very drawn to wearing men’s fragrances, although I did discover recently that I really like Encre Noire. The one genre that does get an automatic NO from me is fougeres – they seem uncompromisingly masculine to me, probably due to their relationship to shaving cream.
mals: fougeres carry a LOT of baggage. HA!
My husband will not wear Perfume, Aftershave and even his deo has to be only lightly scented-unlike me who has everything scented. I have a gay friend who wont wear feminine or uni-sex perfumes but always wears perfume-last count he had about 25 different bottles.When I am wearing Bandit he does comment on how nice it is but thinks its too girly for him!
Thanks for the article Kevin. A few years ago I went on a search for Un Jardin Sur Le Nil for husbands birthday..well I bought the small bottle in case he disliked it.. I would keep for me .. The SA was so nice she filled my bag with a bunch of Hermes samples..I was testing the samples when I got home, as my husband walked in the room, I had just sprayed on some Eau des Mervilles on my wrist and he fell in love with the scent so I went back the next day and got him a full bottle of Eau des Mervilles for his birthday.
ajuarez: that certainly works on men I think
As others have pointed out here before, there is a tremendous cultural element in which types of scents are considered masculine and feminine (rose being a more common note for men in Middle Eastern perfumes, etc.) and also in what is thought appropriate for men and women at different times (nothing other than light, simple soliflores being considered “ladylike” in the West a hundred years or so ago).
I sample and wear a lot of things without really thinking about whether they’re intended to be masculine or feminine—and so many niche perfumes aren’t marketed specifically to either. There are several—including Bois des Iles—that I wish I could get my husband to try because I think they’d smell great on him. He’s happy enough to sniff whatever I’m sampling and comment on it but unfortunately just not interested in wearing any fragrance himself.
I stumbled across this site while looking for information about some Colonia release or other and after a rummage around, I can credit your article on Mitsouko as the jumping off point of my foray into “womens” perfume. The next day I spent an extremely enjoyable lunch hour in Fortnum & Mason’s perfume department and after having been told there was a mens section upstairs and putting up with various “hommes” and “sports” shoved under my nose I eventually walked out with Apres l’Ondee, Mitsouko (of course), a significantly lighter wallet and forearms you could smell from a mile away. I’ve been acquainted with Guerlain scents for some time as my stepmother has always worn various expressions; they’ve been things I’ve adored over the years and I find them to be quite comforting now, it just never occurred to me that I could or should wear them myself. I should probably thank you for highlighting my ignorance. And I never did buy that Colonia.
National Treasure: oh good…glad to have helped deplete that wallet!
Love this article Kevin.
To me, the masculinity of a scent is not so much about the notes or the genre as it is about the application–less scent=more “manly.” But I don’t necessarily prefer my men butch. 🙂
Also love this phrase: “this is a complex subject, ripe for contention and woe.” Useful for so many other things!
SweetLife: Thank you!
What an entertaining article, Kevin! I loved the parts about the JOYful terrier and the Fracas-wearer rearranging his scarf to get attention. 🙂
My husband will let me spritz him with anything at home. When we’re in Hawai’i, he will venture out in my tuberose-y Do Son or The Body Shop Indian Gardenia oil. He cannot walk past a blooming gardenia, tuberose, or jasmine. It is always stop and sniff. I need to work on finding him a rose…
Haunani: well, if you’ve mastered gardenia/tuberose with him…ROSE should be easy!
True that, Kevin! 🙂
Great article Kevin. 10 years ago, I wouldn’t have been caught dead wearing a womans fragrance. That his since changed, and I now wear what I like, regardless of gender the companies market it to. I like it, I wear it. Period. Signed, very comfortable in Black Orchid and Carnal Flower. (Not together of course) 🙂
For some reason, I particularly want to smell Carnal Flower on a man!
SuddenlyInexplicably: buy a sample and “accidentally” spill it on one (preferably one you know and who won’t get riled up!)
C: they might smell good together!
De-lurking here after many many months of enjoyment, as this topic clearly shows I am not alone.
Never being afraid to be “loud” in fragrance terms, despite being a hulking hairy man, I too raid the ladies’ side of the perfume aisle and I can see I am far from being alone.
Tonight I am wearing Habanita layered with Encre Noir – an almost perfect combination. Deeply woody, smoky and tobacco-y (once you get past the first 10 minutes of Habanita, which almost make it a scrubber)
Yesterday was Covet (SJP) layered with O de Lancome, green, deep green and more green.
Other non-gender favourites are splashes of LouLou under Grey Flannel.
Obsession for Women, sweet woods, so much better than the Male version.
Casmir by Chopard – I just get woody ice cream
Eau du The Vert – Roger & Gallet for me the perfect Green Tea, which is also great layered with Covet.
Bulgari Black (not strictly feminine either in character or marketing)
I adore Dzing! and Dzongkha and Traversee du Bosphore, but have problems with longevity, I only get a couple of hours. So will not buy a FB.
But you are just as likely to find me wearing Grey Vetiver, Geoffrey Beene’s Bowling Green, L’Eau D’Issey Antaeus, Christian Lacroix Absynthe (Avon), Fresh Cannabis Santal, almost anything in the Carthusia range, Comme Des Garcons Wonderwood and Joop’s What About Adam (if you could get it anywhere, one of my faves)
For me it is about the scent itself, not who they (the marketeers) want to buy it. In any case, one of my favourite current scents is Dior Homme Intense, but that’s hardly a classic masculine.
I appear to be quite eclectic when I see it written down and I haven’t even mentioned the scents I love but do not currently posses any of.
Trigger Hippie: Welcome! I’ll have to try that combo: Encre Noir and Habanita!
Aromatics Elixir oversprayed with Encre Noire works nicely (if not discreetly!)
Welcome! But, I beg to differ! Obsession for men is far superior 😉 -on me, anyway!
Kevin–the idea of a man wearing Habanita, one of my darlings, makes me want to swoon. Men simply don’t wear colognes or any type of fragrance, that I’ve noticed, here in WY. Possibly a cheap sports cologne, but that’s it. It’s a wasteland here. And, frankly, few women wear perfumes. Honestly. I smelled, twice, in the past year women who were wearing something and commented: both were wearing Flowerbomb. They thought it was the priciest, most exclusive, hottest, chic-est thing going. They simply didn’t know any other fragrance out there existed, aside from the offerings of a Bath and Body Works, which is 150 miles away. I was able to get my boyfriend to use Eau d’Orange Verte by Hermes shampoo and was delighted. This was a fascinating topic for me; thanks so much. (I tried, last night, Memoir Man out, but it just didn’t work on me, sigh.) Enjoy that Habanita! Such a gem! M
Mough: thank you…and I’m always glad to “meet” an Habanita fan. The entire Hermes line in that fragrance is great…bath gel, shampoo, etc.
I just finished typing up an entry about adequate expressions of ~*manliness*~, inspired by how people make a huge deal about my bb, featured in my gravatar, is such a girl even though he…isn’t a girl? XD
One of my friends wore Opium. I didn’t think anything of that, but I don’t know if he got comments from others.
I wouldn’t think anything of a boyfriend wearing a woman’s perfume. I hate white florals, though, so no Fracas ever.
I prefer purple flowers, violets and heliotrope would be acceptable
Krok: I wished I smelled more heliotrope out there…love it.
There’s a flower that grows around campus that I think is heliotrope and it smells so lovely. The butterflies love it too ~___~
You should promote it. Purple florals ~*ftw*~.
Great, great article, Kevin.
You know, I’ve only razzed you once or twice about things being “too feminine” for you only because I’m never sure exactly WHAT form “too feminine” might take. If Joy, Nº5, and 1000 aren’t too feminine, then it seems arbitrary that other things should be deemed such. But your description above makes sense: dainty, frilly soliflores and fruity-florals.
Most here know by now that if I didn’t wear things from the women’s counter, I’d have a really sad perfume existence indeed. I was recently lamenting that so many fragrances labeled as “masculine” seem *so* darn boring lately, or I get tired of the fougere, the dry, the woody, the aromatic.
I wear all kinds of scents, both in private and public. I may not spray enough Carnal Flower or Ubar or Le Labo Orange Blossom to create a huge sillage cloud that I bring on the bus and to work with me, but I’m not necessarily so timid that I dare only take half a spray either.
I enjoy perfume variety, plain and simple. I don’t think anyone *must* wear anything they don’t feel comfortable in, but I would hope that social conventions (other than basic courtesy in terms of amount applied) wouldn’t have to figure into anyone’s feelings about what they *should* be wearing or not. Again, I loved this piece.
Joe: thanks! Your razzing has always been with good humor! HA!
I guess I am a victim of modern day programming…..I know very well that scents aren’t TRULY “masculine” or “feminine,” and these are modern day marketing notions………..but I am also a big gay teddy bear type and just don’t feel right in powdery or fruity florals…..that being said, early in my scent career I relished tiny samples of No. 5, Coco, and …..mmmmmmmm……..Paris. Hard enough to stroll (swagger) into the leather/bear bars smelling of anything at ALL other than the preferred “manscent” (shudder), I could never consider wearing those now. As it is, the most feminine thing I have is Comme’s 8 88 and I wear that daytime only, to the office…….
I don’t feel right anything really “feminine” either for the most part ~___~
ThomK:being comfortable in what you wear IS important…if it doesn’t “fit”…it should not be worn.
My husband’s perfumes (which consist entirely of things I have bought for him) have mostly been “masculine” scents, with a few unisex thrown in. I’m afraid he is one of those who would never wear something that he thought was meant for women. I don’t ever refer to any of them as “perfume” either–they are “cologne”. The one “feminine” he has right now is Chanel Cuir de Russie, and I had to give it to him without mentioning its intended gender. I just told him that the name means “Russian Leather” which I figured would sound masculine enough. Now that he has been wearing it for quite a while, I have considered telling him just to get his reaction, but so far I haven’t. I honestly think it smells better on him than on me. After all, what is so feminine about leather anyway?
You know, this issue goes a lot deeper than perfume. Many women (including myself) have at one time or another worn items of clothing sold as “men’s” and thought nothing of it, but very few men would be comfortable buying and wearing items of women’s clothing, even if they are stylistically identical to the men’s items (e.g., athletic shoes, socks, jackets, sweaters). I recently found myself in need of a new pair of work shoes. My job require comfortable, durable shoes that I can walk around in all day on a hard floor. After finding nothing remotely suitable in the women’s section, I turned to the men’s shoe department and found exactly what I needed in about 2 minutes. I don’t care if they are “men’s” shoes; I like them, they fit, they are comfortable and don’t hurt my feet, and they were reasonably priced. If someone asked me where I got them, I would have no problem telling them that I got my shoes in the men’s shoe department. How many men, on the other hand, would dare to try on or buy shoes in the women’s department, much less admit to anyone else that they had done so?
50Roses: TRUE…men would not “admit” to buying from a women’s clothing department (usually). I guess an occasional scarf or sweater could pass muster but that info would not likely be shared with other men…or women. So beware: telling your hubby Cuir de Russie was a women’s scent may ruin it for him and YOU…if you love to smell it on him.
I probably won’t tell him–that is, unless he someday becomes enough of a perfumista to not care anymore, and that is not likely to happen. Fortunately, he does not read this site, so he won’t find out that way. I do like to smell CdR on him. I just find it a really warm, cozy, comforting scent that seems to blend so well with his own scent. Honestly, if I didn’t know what it was and I was smelling it for the first time, I would probably think it was a masculine.
But why should a man wear woman’s clothing (except to deliberately cross dress, which is a whole different story)?.
Women’s clothes run smaller, and are more expensive. Stores which offer men free alterations charge women, and a woman’s shirt costs more to have cleaned than a man’s, even if made of the same material?
Nice menswear is still expensive…and some styles are harder to find.
For instance, if a guy likes Rick Owens but can not afford the clothes, he’ll probably have an easier time looking for cheaper alternatives that are actually women’s clothing.
Some men are very thin and fit into women’s clothing easier. If you can already fit into something why buy something else and have it altered?
There are lots of reasons.
Kevin, this is simply the BEST post and discussion: poetic, thought-provoking and funny. I love “Mitsouko (nix the rice face powder and kimono…if you wish)” LOL!
And you chose the was the most DEVILISHLY perfect photo for it. I hadn’t seen that photo for many years, so I kept studying it, struggling to retrieve the identity hovering on the edge of my memory – a 60s Brit rocker? an Edwardian author? THEN I noticed the HANDS – WOMEN’S HANDS! – and concluded that it was an artistic photo staged with two models (male face and female hands) to make an ironic comment on gender. 🙂 I guess I won’t quit my day job to become an art critic, LOL!
I hadn’t even looked closely until you mentioned it. I think one of Duchamp’s Rrose Selavy photos would have been perfect as well.
Oh, interesting idea! According to Wikipedia, Rose Delavy “also appears on the label of Belle Haleine, Eau de Voilette, a 1921 readymade that is a perfume bottle in the original box.” Eros C’est la Vie as the face of The Beautiful Breath! Makes me wonder if Duchaufour was really thinking of the dessert when he created La Belle Helene… 😉
Noz; thank you! G O’Keeffe had the most beautiful hands, didn’t she?
Kevin- what a lovely post. Thanks. Especially love to ruminate on good smells after spending a good part of my evening in the backyard dealing with a plumbing SITUATION.
Love your cross gender choices- some of my favorites- Joy parfum is marvelous. I appreciated Angela’s post suggesting it for our First Lady too.
Helenv: hope the air has “cleared” by now? HA!
Geez, I don’t know any men who wear fragrance. No wonder I am a perfume nut – I’ve been nasally deprived. This is a little off topic, but I’m female and I used to love wearing Bel Ami until Hermes reformulated the charm out of it. Back on topic, I once read that Keith Richard wears Joy.
Sorry, I forgot to say how much I enjoyed reading your article Kevin. I already know that I’ll be walking around trying to secretly sniff men tomorrow!
Peke: hope you had some GOOD luck with the sniffing. I still like Bel Ami…even though it’s not as tough as it once was.
Among the “feminine” perfumes I’ll occasionally wear:
Jicky
Vol de Nuit
L’Heure Bleu (notice a pattern here?)
Bandit
Balmain de Balmain
PhinC: those Guerlains come in handy for men, don’t they?
Quite often I’ll wear No. 5 edt while working on the counter, and so many people (men & women) ask me what my “aftershave” is, because they love it. I’m yet to sell No. 5 to a man after that, because they get a bit freaked out by the thought.
I have several “feminines” in my collection: Shalimar, Jicky, Midnight Poison, No. 5, YSL Nu, Idylle, Stella Rose Absolute, Belle d’Opium, Balenciaga Paris, Bvlgari Blv II (summer version) and several others I can’t think of right now.
I have one male customer who will only wear feminine fragrances, he last bought Alien, Obsession, and Dior Addict. Not many are as open minded as him.
Gblue: I rarely see guys at the women’s perfume counter either…though several male SA’s at my Nordstrom wear full make-up…when I see men prowling the aisles they are usually “shopping for a friend.”
I know many men who wear Bandit. And a few who wear Tauer’s Reverie au Jardin, which I hadn’t considered unisex originally, but now totally understand how it works on a man!
Your comment that men enjoy dessert smells is very pertinent – I know a few who like Musc Maori and Aomassai from Parfumerie Generale, and Un Bois de Vanille from Serge Lutens.
Blimunda: gourmands are usually an easier sell to men…all the A*men scents, vanillic ambers, etc.
Thank you Kevin for a pleasant and humorous reading. And what a tsunami of a reaction! 🙂
As most of male scent-fanatics (“perfumista” is a good word but still it obviously narrows one’s interests down to “man manufactured fragrances” leaving all the nature’s wonders behind I think)… so as a male scent-fanatic I sure do wear feminine frags. But in contrast to you Kevin I doubt I would ever wear Joy. I have a vintage perfume (they glamourously called it “Parfum- Compagnon”) The balance is ideal but we two just don’t get on 🙂
BUT I sometimes wear Fracas and Tubereuse (L’Artisan). Not that often, but there are days when from Tubereuse there’s only fresh cream butter (well plain natural butter made from plain natural cow milk cream) remains on my skin and as to Fracas,.. well the main thing is not to overdo it. Now it’s high time to asure you and everyone else around here that I’m not in the 2nd category and under no circumstances I’ll will come to you with a veil scarf wafted in the air (why should I even have one: a man sturdily-build of forty+, very short cut/ nearly shaved hair and a six o’clock stubble by lunch) :))) But that damn Fracas (sorry again!) and I somehow get along – gender just doesn’t matter. A little loud (even in a minimal application) and a little vulgar but still smooth-textured and pleasing.
As to the rest -Bandit and the rest of green chypres(Givenchy III, Silences etc), LeTemps d’Une Fete (Nicolay), Diors (like Eau Fraiche and Diorella) and Mitsouko of course, sorry, Kevin, Mishima of course 😉 and a lot more
It is in constant quite obsessive rotation along with for example Eau d’Hermes, Egoist (original) Azzaro (same), Amouages (masculines) Carons (Yatagan and the 3rd) , Lauder (the first for men pleasant musky woody citric seductive thing), Aramises (classic, Tuscany , Havana, Devin…) and so on.
Oh dear, I sure wrote a lot . And the last /and probably the only thing I should’ve written): It is completely stupid to
deprive oneself of your own pleasure. Why worry about gender in perfume, much more kind to you and everyone around to find the one really fits you like a glove. The choice (as everyone here knows) is each time a very subtle balance between air humidity-one’s intentions-sensitivity to smells people around you-clothes-but mostly mood. So to say, an inner melody /a good image, probably Turin’s copyright 🙂 / is all that matters. Only paying attention to these subtleties one can COMFORTLY (this is important i believe) wear whatever perfume he would choose. (Though I never ever could wear Joy, sigh) 🙂
andrew: sorry about the “problem” between you and JOY! You and Joy have the same “relationship” I have with Fracas, Carnal Flower and all tuberose scents…though i enjoy smelling them on others.
You’re right, Kevin about me and Joy. And it IS a pity because Joy is breathtakingly beautiful to me, I just probably ain’t man enough to wear it 🙂 And as to you and all those tuberoses : you don’t feel like you’re losing too much, right 😉
I’m late to the party here, but I’ve never detected a fragrance gender bias in your articles. Luca Turin wrote something along the lines that as many people’s politics begin leaning right with age, so do perfumes become more masculine over time. He was referring to Arpege but it is true of many classic “women’s” fragrances esp. when compared to the glut of fruity florals, cupcake gourmands, and the whole trend of “clean” fragrances.
Many of my faves are definitely unisex like the TF Amber Absolute I’m wearing now. I’ve opened my perfume closet to my 23 year old daughter and she always chooses aromatic fougeres for herself.
Julia: I don’t have the patience to look it up, but one of my favorite Turin lines is that as time goes on many feminine scents have “breast reductions” — becoming more masculine in character.
Kevin, have a bottle of Mitsouko and something like “I love it too” printed on your t-shirt, and see if he notices 🙂
Ada: I saw him this morning! Of course, didn’t say a word.
If I met a man wearing Mitsouko I’d approach him excitedly! Anyway, there are several of my perfumes I think would be great on a guy. Nuit de Noel. Angel. Missoni. Dune. My husband stopped wearing perfume to work, which I think is too bad for him. He works at a conservative company and since he’s French, he doesn’t want fulfill any French stereotypes. In other words, he really wants to blend in. I’ve been trying to convince him to wear just a spray for himself. Meanwhile, I’ll be borrowing his Knize Ten, Vetiver and Habit Rouge. I can’t come ’round to his fougeres on myself.
Ceelouise: Nuit de Noel would be great. ANd your hubby wanting to blend in…how UN-French! HA! Accentuate that Frenchness please.
Hi Kevin,
I want you to know that because of YOU, I just bought my first (samples) of Jicky and Mitsouko. Your reviews just blew my mind and I knew that I had to get them and try them for myself. WELL NOW – I am a junkie. I cannot decide which one I love better. Both are intense in their own ways but because I love both of them, I can’t decide which one to wear exclusively to determine how well they do on me. Usually in the morning I use Jicky and by night, I am spraying Mitsouko. I also find it undeniably sexy to think that a man would wear the Mitsouko. For some reason, the thought never crossed my mind that a man would wear a “womans” scent even though I wear mens all the time. I love your articles, descriptions and perfume loves. THANK you for introducing me to these scents. Jicky I think is going to be my wedding day scent even though my man thinks is smells OL (old lady)… I am an old lady in a young body and that is that!
Michelle:Oh, that makes me feel GOOD. Thank you. And really like the “old lady in a young body” thought!
My BF started wearing my TF Black Orchid Voile De Fleur when he first started staying at my house. It took me a minute to realize why it was off putting, and I realized though, it was like smelling *myself*. It confused the part of my brain that identified him with a smell. I brought out the bottle of TF black orchid original, hoping that would be an acceptable change, but every one in a while i swear he still wears the other one. It gave me an opportunity to shower him with other fragrances, I’ve also bought him one unisex, two others for men: DS & Durga Cowboy Grass, bc he liked my Cowgirl Grass, and TF Tuscan Leather bc it fulfills some fantasy of mine and had nothing to do with what he likes. I am beginning to think that for someone so obsessed with fragrance, Ive been rather insensitive to what he actually likes. I kept falling into this his and hers thing, like “we will be the couple this fragrance is describing”…. Must go get him his own VDF now and apologize for trying to make him smell like a fashionable downtown cowboy.
Amanda: yes, let him revel in TF Black Orchid VdF! AND you can always treat him to a bag of “personally curated” samples every now and again and let, a-hem, HIM choose one that he likes. Devious..but it works for both of you.
What a great article Kevin! Thank you, thank you. Bandit and Jicky (the parfum) and Hypnotic Poison are the foundation of my fragrance collection, and both women and men frequently do the “you smell good, what are you wearing” line. So I say if you love it and you know it works for you, then wear it, spritz it, spray it, and enjoy it! I just returned from a trip to NYC, and sniffed, tested, and followed my nose at countless counters. Most of the sales associates at the counters wondered what I was wearing as I was sampling and visiting etc, and I regularly confessed it was Dune! (1oz bottle travels easily)……..so yet again another “feminine” on this GuerlainGuy. Keep up the great work Kevin!
GuerlainGuy: thank you…always liked Dune too.
Jicky would be one of my favourites, although I have many scents that could go either way. In fact, I think most scents fall in that category, and if they were presented in “gender neutral” packaging (like the recent Donna Karan re-issues) I think more of them would “cross over.”
But my absolute, go-to favourites are the really strong masculines – Yatagan, Teck, Balenciaga PH, Kourous, Le Labo Oud 27 – and I would LOVE to smell any one of them on a woman. I think they would smell so sexy on a woman that, if I didn’t actually swoon, I would probably throw her over my shoulder and carry her off to my cave.
I absolutely love that Jicky and Mitsouko are talked about and loved so much. Such a pleasure.
I firmly believe that most, if not all, of the classic chypres can be easily worn by men today, particularly the ballsier ones like Mitsouko, Bandit, and Diorella. That mossy/woody/patchouli stuff smells good on anyone alive, and even some animals. Sweeter and more floral things like Fracas and Joy are slightly dicier propositions for men, I suppose, but with light application, what’s the worst that can happen? You’re wearing a smell, not a bra. Such fuss over not much.
(And now I’ll shoot my stance to hell by saying that I don’t wear more than one spray at a time of Chanel Coco. That stuff be damned perfumey for this fella, but I love it so much I refuse to stop wearing it.)
I’m only 15, but I’ll share some of my budding interest anyways. As of now and since forever, I have a pretty strong interest in women’s fragrance ( well, 99% were bought by mum, she picked his colognes too). Particularly in Jo Malone’s Lime Basil Mandarin scent, but to me it still smell a bit fruity, but mature enough. Otherwise it would be red rose or grapefruit, these are the light notes, and since they’re generally speaking- leaning a bit on unisex. I wear at home and important events, but no one really pays attention, no friends have really seen me with perfume. I know one thing though- when I mention this, all of my friends just stare at me as if i’m a bit odd, and the girls just join in and gossip their way.