As promised, just for fun here are some of the entries for the 2014 Prix Eau Faux that didn't make it to the finals — if you missed it, we've already announced this year's winner. There are too many to post (or read) all at once, so I'll be posting them in three groups (look for more the next two Saturdays).
Make Your Garden (submitted by Pedro)
"Make Your Garden has been vehemently sown. We dragged the earth to prevent it to be weakened. Solitary use in her pillow makes her remember you. And keep the comparison model available to see you... Twice. Expensive in light formulation.
Listen to the refugee back to see you go to bed . You would find it was beautiful but looked like she was impatient. I understand about the tenderness of breathless. Rather we applied it, then smiled. Her long hair should tell him that She Now Dresses In Black .
From Make Your Garden, the creators of “Who’s Your Archetype?” comes a rainbow in three arches: Bergamot, Vetyver, Oud Wood... From instinct to sadness to exhilaration!. She Now Dresses In Black. Parfum!!!"
Le Trou de Rose Version 1 (submitted by Dana)
Follow Alice on her journey to enlightenment. Innocence and bravery collide in a bucolic English adventure through the resplendent landscape of sweetness, redolence and fecundity.
Modest tea and cakes were had in quiet garden faire,
When afterward she took a sip a languid country air.
Hied past the dahlias and petunias where gently she bent down-
Breathed in the wind of Garden Queen- brow cocked by strange arome...
But then she glint, cheek velvet blushed, "Tis not of flora within my nose
-tis me! That breeze I do perceive, from my le trou de rose!
Creep by Lizard Lounge (submitted by BombshellBetsy)
A passing glance.
Unwanted. Yet, not unwelcome.
Meet a grand fougere: slick, full, and unapologetic. Perfumer Roland Vergehen Lurker combines black spruce, tobacco, clean sweat, hot breath, thick molasses, old jokes, gym class, dryer lint, and the essence of the yet-to-be discovered Moldovan Arsenic lily to create not just a fragrance, but a presence.
Repel them. Bask in the irony of their return. They want to leave. But you won't let them.
Creep.
By Lizard Lounge
Campylobacter By Pistil and Stamen (submitted by BombshellBetsy)
You're hot to the touch. Doubled over. You felt fine yesterday.
It's a blur. Dinner. Raw. Paralysis. Red. Poultry.
Fascinating.
A blend of candied fruit, pepper, Lust, prayers, unpasteurized milk, tincture of iodine, ampersands, and rose.
Who is she? Where did you find her? What is she called?
Campylobacter
By Pistil and Stamen
You can be treated.
DeliKatniss by Effie Trinket (submitted by Lucasai)
Effie Trinket is a star-born diva, a vivid persona who lives for the applause of people who surround her. She deserves all the bling of this world and a perfume worth a royal hairness… erm highness.
Straight from the Capitol, Effie is proud to present her debut fragrance – DeliKatniss. This gourmand perfume surrounds you with a delicious smell of grapefruit and rhubarb that melt with your skin covering it with a sticky layer of benzoin-infused honey and vanilla caramel. Once you become a part of it, you’ll feel like a sweet goddess of amaretti biscuits and dark chocolate cream.
The perfume is kept in a Mockingjay flacon with a silver crown-cap on its head.
Happy Hunger Games! And may the cookies be ever in your flavor!
Camilla by Fortnum & Mason (submitted by Ted Midnight)
World-famous retailer Fortnum & Mason is celebrating Britain’s classy ladies with their first fragrance, Camilla, dedicated to the Duchess of Cornwall, Camilla Parker-Bowles.
Camilla features graceful notes of hyacinth bouquet, Earl Grey tea and polished oak. The fragrance is presented in a 100ml teapot-shaped porcelain flacon commissioned from Royal Doulton, the renowned purveyors of fine china, and comes replete with hand-painted scotty dogs.
When Fortnum & Mason presented the brief to acclaimed perfumer Bertrand Duchafour, he immediately embraced the project with enthusiasm. ‘I can’t say no to much!’ he commented.
Camilla is available in Eau de Toilette exclusively at Fortnum’s Piccadilly store, London.
Le French Eau de Velours Côtelé (submitted by Oakland Fresca)
Le French has launched Eau de Velours Côtelé (corduroy), the ninth in their Blanchisserie Series of scents for garments that includes Eau de Laine (cotton), Eau de Chapeau (hat), Eau de Chapeau en Feutre (felt hat), Eau de Jupe (skirt), Eau de Chaussette (sock), Eau de Rayonne (rayon), Eau de Tenue de Soirée (evening dress), and Eau de Flanelle (flannel).1
“I wanted it to evoke dewiness to this new fresh, without it being fresh,” Le French’s top nose Frank Frank explained.
Eau de Velours Côtelé adds a fashionable fragrance to corduroy skirts, pants, and even jackets. Eau de Velours Côtelé is unisex, and for a man, there is no scent that so immediately captures his spirit and bon goût. Eau de Velours Côtelé can be layered with all of the fragrances in the Blanchisserie Series, for a scintillating swaddled scent.
The soft, pliable notes of Eau de Velours Côtelé include rose, citrus, and musk.
1. Eau de Flanelle is exclusively sold online at www.lefrenchoverstock.com.
Baiser Poulinière--Enjoy the ride! (submitted by Oakland Fresca)
Curry Favor is launching its stunning debut fragrance, Baiser Poulinière. CF fragrance artist A. Strang describes the complexity of his art, and his passion: “Baiser Poulinière is intoxicating, sensual, giving, and demanding.”
Baiser Poulinière seduces with the warmth of sweet, sweat-drenched saddles, it satiates with layers of apple, cane sugar, Ambrox, and dry hay, and soothes with heavenly breaths of moist earth, fresh roots, and crushed rose buds.
Baiser Poulinière will be sold in authentic burlap lined boxes, each one seasoned for four months in the stables of the world’s finest thoroughbreds. Strang has distinguished 100 of these extraordinary works of art with a kiss. Explains Strang, “Because Baiser Poulinière demands my lips, my breath, I make this loving art for you. You must enjoy the ride.” Barn boxes branded with the artist’s kisses will be available at Barney’s flagship store in Manhattan, only four per customer, through April 1.
Ripoff Imperiale (submitted by anonymous)
Ripoff Imperiale is a new exclusive niche house, founded by E. Ripoff who has ancestral connections to several European courts. Her paternal great-great-great-great grandmother emptied the bedpan of Napoleon once, and she herself was named after empress Elisabeth of Austria and the two monarchs of Great Britain. Ripoff has extensive experience from the prestigious Givaudan Institute and after receiving the 26th rejection for her application, she finally decided to launch her own line in order “to create the olfactory equivalent of Schroedinger’s cat, or the Emperor’s new clothes”.
Her debut perfume, Les Trois Hemispheres: Nord is inspired by the ancient rites of summer equinox in the Arctic Circle. "For centuries, shamans have reconnected with Nature to ensure the fertility of crops and villagers alike, occasionally aided by the Spirit of the Bottle enabling them to speak the mystic languages incomprehensible to mortal ears. Nord plays the complex fragrant symphony emitted by the modern-day shamans, captured by headspace technology which enabled us to capture the precious essences without inducing any harm on these delicate creatures."
by Perfumes Without Names (submitted by 50_Roses)
“The name becomes the thing, and the thing becomes the name.” So muses Sue d’Eaunime, the creative force behind Perfumes Without Names, a new indie house based on, as Sue puts it, “a game-changing paradigm shift. As soon as you put a name to something, you create expectations in people’s minds based on their associations with that name, how it will look or sound or smell or feel, and they may be disappointed if their own impressions don’t match the name. Some perfumers have attempted to deal with this by giving their perfumes numbers or by calling them ‘Untitled’, but those are still names. My intention is to dispense with all that my not naming my perfumes at all, thereby allowing the customer to create his or her own impressions free of any preconceived expectations.”
will be available in 50 ml for $75, packaged in a plain bottle (again, no preconceived expectations), exclusive to the company’s website. No list of notes is provided.
Genesis by Biblical Perfumes (submitted by 50_Roses)
And God said let there be…perfume? That is the premise behind new perfume house Biblical Perfumes. “Thanks to the power of modern computer-based cryptographical analysis, people are discovering all sorts of hidden messages encoded in the text of the Bible—cures for diseases, predictions about world events, you name it”, asserts company founder Daniel John. “We have used our own analyses of Biblical texts to discover instructions for formulating exquisite perfumes. Incense and perfumes were held in extremely high regard in ancient times, being used as an integral part of worship, so it is not surprising that ancient sacred writings would include recipes for perfumes.”
For their first fragrance, Biblical Perfumes has produced Genesis, an all-natural masculine scent created from a formula found in the very first book of the Bible. “Genesis is the story of beginnings—the beginning of the universe, the earth, mankind—and so it was only fitting that we drew upon it for our first fragrance.” Genesis is priced at 50 ml for $1533.
Equinoxe de Printemps by Parfums de Terre (submitted by 50_Roses)
Parfums de Terre is a new indie perfume house dedicated to producing all-natural perfumes based on the concept of harmony with the earth. “Our quest is to create perfumes that will enhance the wearer’s spiritual self-actualization by facilitating the achievement of centeredness and balance by opening the chakras and aligning the wearer’s chi with the vibrations of the earth and all the celestial bodies in the cosmos, allowing the wearer to achieve the ultimate Nirvana”, according to PdT’s one-woman tour de force Harmony Bliss.
The first release from PdT is Equinoxe de Printemps, a unisex scent named for the time of year when “everything is in balance—night and day are equal in length—yet the anticipation is for growth and enlightenment. As the days lengthen, earth’s flora and fauna will experience growth and abundance. In the same fashion, Equinoxe de Printemps prepares the wearer to achieve personal growth and fulfillment.” Equinoxe de Printemps is available in extrait from the company’s website, 7 ml for $50.
Hydro Green by Orbital Ether (submitted by Silvrolive)
Orbital Ether: The rarest perfumes in the universe.
With elements grown and mixed beyond the limits of terrestrial gravity, our scents are like nothing on Earth. Our future projects include a mysore sandalwood colony on Mars and Moon oud.
Orbital Ether presents Hydro Green. Our premier scent combines the rarest vetiver grown hydroponically on the International Space Station with distilled sandalwood and rose oils, and our own proprietary powdered orange Tang essence. The elements of this perfume are created, carefully collected and mixed with utmost care by NASA astronauts in a zero gravity environment. This scent is for the discerning client and would make a wonderful memento for an intrepid space tourist.
Black Spring by Obsédé Sexuel Parfums (submitted by pomarestolenperfume)
In honor of Henry Miller and a time when men were men, comes Black Spring. Opening with a deep wood and ripe un-showered masculinity, Black Spring reminisces of a time when a man could drink whiskey in the morning and smoke indoors. Notes of tobacco and musk give way to the distinctive smell of ripple and jug wine. With Black Spring there are no limits, just dirty cotton mixed with the faint smell of the women you slept with last night.
B—Eau by Pas de Parfum (submitted by Jonas.)
Avant-garde house Pas de Partum dares to invent a new class of perfume in its namesake, the pas de parfum. Gleefully contravening the famous words of Mlle Chanel, it is now those who wear her antiquated formulations that are futureless. Pas de Parfum adheres to a heterodox philosophy that eschews perfumery's doctrinal ingredients and rigidly dogmatic conventions. Each composition is based on the corpus odoris of an illustrious personage commingled in an unrivalled blend of water, minerals, lactate and urea.
B—Eau, Pas de Parfum's debut creation, is the essence of Beau Brummell the men's fashion maven who made going sans senteur de rigueur among the aristocracy. This is the dandified odor of a Byronian libertine who does not need perfume to smell libidinous. The carnal head notes rub scandalously against the fleshy core of cumin and shallots, held back from total hedonistic satyrism only by the merest wisp of English Lavender: A body scent so alluring and jeopardous that it will ultimately lead to its bearer's demise.
Thank you for posting these. It is so much fun to see the creativity within our community.
Hey, thanks for entering!
Thank you for posting!!
Oh Campylobacter! LOL
🙂
These are ALL winners. Creep . . . “barn boxes branded with the artist’s kisses”. . . “proprietary powdered orange Tang essence”. . . I’ll revisit this page often.
Campylobacter, Creep and B–Eau!!! Bwah hah ha ha! 😀 So brilliant. Thank you for posting these, and Robin (and judge team)for hosting the Prix Eau Faux. I love it. NST commenters, you amaze me with your wit. Thank you.
BTW, I think a weird honorable mention should go to the real life fragrance Chester Cheetau! I really thought that was a joke. We could not have made that kind of silliness up if we tried. Wonder if any of the kind folks here at NST smelled it? Just wondering. Be well.
Campylobacter– I laughed out loud! Also, loved the idea of a fragrance created from Biblical references… oh the healing power!